bff Tale – She be the baddest

The baddest in the best way as far as besties go.

I met my bff at Micky D’s where we both worked as teens back in High School. We were from different towns but had much in common. We were the same age, had strict daddies, and lived in suburbia. Um, I guess that’s about it. Opposites attract they say, and I suppose that is what happened with me and my girl as it wasn’t long after we started flipping burgers together that we were inseparable. And while we have had a few stay-cations, over the years we have had the most fun.

Of course we did fight. Often. To the point where we got separated at work quite a bit and the managers had to put duck-tape on the floor indicating which zones we were not to cross to get at each other. However, still, we crossed the zones anyway. One time during an argument she even ran up and stuck a straw into my ear while I was waiting on a Customer and was promptly sent home. Just for the day. That was me and my girl.

After I relayed that her boyfriend had confided in me that he wanted to run off with me we didn’t speak for almost 2 years (ie. stay-cation). Yet we still worked at the same job. To resolve any conflicts Mickey D’s had to put us on opposite shifts. Ah, the concessions they made for us. We did keep updates on each other though. In fact, I did hear how she wouldn’t be able to make it to work one day because she couldn’t find her car or her shoes.

As teens, in the relationship front we were opposites as well. I was the serious relationship girl and she usually wanted no strings attached. Dumb me! One time, Squig who had been trying to court me for awhile was quite surprised when he decided to join me at the last-minute for a night out with my girl. There she was waiting for me. With two guys.

Of course he promptly accused her of trying to set me up with one of them. She immediately cleared that up for him. They were BOTH for her. Really? Squig found this, well, astounding. “You’re going to sleep with both of them guys?” he asked “Don’t you think that’s a little bit fucked up?” You see in the bad boy’s world only the boys can be bad. “No,” she clarified, “I am only sleeping with the one who is not my boyfriend. His best friend.” I think Squig was speechless for the first time. Ever.

Weeks later though, I did help distract her boyfriend with promises of my candy so she could have another tryst with his best friend. After all, what are best friends for? Eh, I changed my mind. Alas, by sunrise the gig was up.  Needless to say, the boys were no longer friends. Me and my girl laughed as we passed them both in their separate cars on the highway. Sorry boys.

She helped me out too. After partying for a night in the city we suddenly remembered we had no car and were without a ride back home to burbs. No worries I had told her. I knew my ex-boyfriend (ya the one who had treated me like a princess) was just ending his shift at the video store where he worked and I had a brilliant idea. We could ask him for a ride. Well since I was no longer his princess, he informed me he had a date and would not be driving me and my bf to the burbs.

Uh-huh, that’s what he thought. As he went to get into his car I jumped him, quickly crawled across his lap to the passenger side and unlocked the back door. “Get in!,” I directed my girl. She did, and yes we did hijack my ex and force him to drive us home.  Guilty as charged! He did call his mom first to let her know so it was ok. I wonder if she still hates me though.

Later on, we learned a better way of getting rides. By being two hot girls simply walking late at night. Yep, that’s it.  Cops would see us and ask if we needed help. Why yes, we needed a ride to where-ever we needed a ride. And they would drive us. Yes they would. One night they even dropped us to a party as we carried a twelve pack of beer in a brown paper bag. Yes they did. And if we ever needed to cross town lines, there would be a transfer to the Police in the next town,I have two female subjects.”

Listen, I’m not saying I condone this by the way. I’m just saying this is how it was living in suburbia. At least for me and my bf.

Later we ruled the club scene. Dancing. Bumping and grinding, driving the boys crazy, yes with each other, not them. Of course I left at mid-night and she would always call me later to relay an after story. Some were funny. Some were not. I did get a kick out of a friend calling me one night asking where exactly she lived because she could not find her own apartment in the complex. Or how she had this obsession with the telephone late night and would argue with the operator because her calls never got dialed quite correctly;)

Even after I had babies young my bf did not abandon me. One particular eve, when she found herself out in the cold she called 911 for a ride and when they asked if it was an emergency she said, “Yes, I am freezing my ass out here come get me!” And when they didn’t come quick enough, she called back to tell them to “hurry up!” I was up feeding baby J as the flashing blue lights pulled into the driveway to deliver my bf for a late night visit. Classic.

“Trust you me I blow up shop, Had a little nig’ calling the cops, Watch”  

 ~MC Lyte

Of course we have both grown up over 25 years. We have seen each other through marriages, babies, break-ups, and a great many other challenges. However, while we remain polar opposites, and our lives have taken very different paths -the bond we share remains  unbreakable. There is something we have called unconditional love. Without judgement, without question.

And so my bf became my bff.

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